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How good you constructs have it...

You constructs are so lucky...
You guys actually have the ablility...
The ability to know when another construct likes you...
Without them having to directly come up and tell you to your face...
You just don't understand how good you construct have it...

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Mad as a Hatter Journal #2: Coversations with a demon

One might ask...
How does that work?
Well it works when one person is me...
and the other person is Edricth...
My 8 foot tall demon friend...
Now I know what your thinking...
Run for the the hills...
Next it will tell him to kill people...
Now now you silly little cardinals...
Don't go flying the coop just so soon you see...
My big bad friend is just a gentle ol teddy bear...
I have figured out he is most certianly good...
Plus a few nights ago when I wanted to beat up a roomate...
He was the one who told me not to... Because he cares...

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Mad as a Hatter Journal #1: What did I do wrong?

I feel like I have gone completely nuts...
It has happened...
I have have finally snapped...
Everyone around me seems so evil that is a fact...
I am thinking of dropping out of college...
Because I can't stand to be around people...
I am tried of the bullies...
I am tried of the rejection...
Animals are my only friends...
Edricth is my only companion...
Everytime I see a female...
My heart aches becuase I am alone...
Everytime I see a guy...
Other parts ache because I am unwanted...

Yet I feel such hate in my hate for all of you...

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My new friend...

Uhmmm... this may seem like a werid question to pose, but is there anything wrong with having a friend that no one else seems to be able to see. He tells me his name is Edrich... at least that is how I think it is spelled, and if you are wondering yes I can hear him talking to me. I feel kind of crazy just talking about it, but I feel I need too... :) I don't think there is anything wrong with it, becuase it means I don't have to worry so much about making friends with other people anymore.

What do you guys think?.... :S

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Me now...

It has been a long time sinice I really posted anything on here and I kind of wanted to give you guys an update on how my life has been, ever sinice I got to the new college that I have always wanted to go to....

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Help...

I don't know what to do... I feel like I can't express my sadness :(

Plus I feel that I shouldn't even be sad... I have no reason to be sad... but I am very sad.... WTF is going on :( I don't understand.... I mean how in the fuck am I just suppossed to stop being sad... maybe it is not sadness, but the fact I am lonely? Yet I have no reason to be that ethier... :(

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I read the journals and I wonder about myself sometimes...

Like I wonder do I even belong on this site...
I mean my first taste of porn was just a bunch of male on male furries... and that has been the only thing that turns me on... :(
Never has a two image of two actual human male's turned me on :(...
Plus my mind is so messed up and I am falling so far behind the rest of you I might as well be a gay five year old... :( that depends on if I am even gay becuase frankly I have never experimented before and so I have no way of fucking knowing anything about myself.

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Curious Question?

Hey I have been wanting to know... Has anyone ever seen the show... It's Always Sunny In Philidephia... It is a super funny show that has always pulled me out of my depressive states whenever I wacth it becuase it kind of has that sick type of humor that I like in it... :P

Basically I could call it a real life version of South Park, but frankly at least the boys in south park actually learn a lesson every now and then :P And don't try to kill each other for even a quick buck :P

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My birdy.... Birds....

I hate the entire human race.... I really can't stand it anymore, but really I guess there is nothing I can do about it anymore... I mean seriously I have to be honest I will never have the balls to kill myself. So I am not sucidal. I never want to die, and probably will always be to scared to. Frankly I am a coward and will always have to live with that every single moment knowing that I have a way out of all of this and frankly I can't take it no matter what.

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Talking to Chickens...

For some reason I feel so alone...
I feel like my only friends now are my pet chickens...
My little disabled Bantam named 'No Leg'...
My recovering Bantam named 'One Leg'
My fiesty Rhode Island Red named 'Big Red'
My top of the pecking order Black Bantam Rooster 'Bennie'
My little lovable Silkie named 'Drood'...
I love and adore them so much...
The only thing I ever want to do is spend time around the flock...
Just cuddling and holding them...
I don't have any friends...
I don't like spending any time around people anymore...
Or at least that is the way I am starting to feel...

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An Apology Letter to Chris and others on Oasis

Dear Chris, Lonewolf, and the rest of Oasis

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Has anyone played the game Alice...?

Has anyone played the game Alice...? I would like to talk about the game with anyone who knows anything about becuase it's symbolic nature and everything about just instrest me becuase I am huge Alice In Wonderland fan :P

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Has anyone played the game Alice...?

Well I am going to be talking about two things today... First is game... and the second is what in my opinion is people making way to big a deal out of somthing simple.

Ok for the first thing... Has anyone played the game Alice or played the new sequal... Alice: Madness Returns... I have only played through a bit of the second and would like if anyone wants to discuss the symbolic nature of the stuff in the game becuase it is what I would call a hella trippy game. *Loves him some Chesire Cat*

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How Dare You Touch Elizabath :P

Well remember how I told you guys that I was going to get another cat after my old one ran away. Well we have gone and have gotten my new cat form the animal shelter.... and I have named her Elizabeth... if you ever wacthed the anime Gintama then you know where I got the name form the duck like charater on that show :P... Not form any silly Queeens...

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Escape form Zion+Lost Pussy+General Unrest+Time at my Grandma's+New Pussy+Wondering if Exersise is Getting Anywhere=An Ok Day

Well here is another math eqaution journal for me, so like last time it is time to explain it all :P...

1. Well I have finally finished the expansion for Fallout New Vegas called Honest Hearts, and I would have to say that I was quite impressed especially becuase they added the Tommy Gun to the game which really gave my charater a gangster feel to him when he goes walking into New Vegas. Plus the Burned Man himself Jousha Garham was quite a pimp himself, becuase he had a pistol known as, "A Light in the Darkness" Which was a beast of a .45 :P....

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