I came out to everyone I love. My parents, my little sister, my friends. I'm done. I've told everyone that needs to know, and everyone else can find out secondhand.
People at school are finding out. It's good. I'm glad. The third meeting of the GSA was last tuesday We're really coming together as a group. And now that I'm "out", the other GSM kids will hopefully be more open. Since they know that they're represented in the leadership of the club, and aren't being led by three straight girls that can't relate to some of what they're going through.
The first meeting of the GSA is on tuesday. And even though I'm the founder, the girl that was helping me has pushed me out of the loop. I get the information related to the GSA at the same time as all the other interested members, with no voice in what happens. And I haven't yet thought of a way to tell her I'm angry without sounding bitchy or passive-aggressive.
Also, seven people at school now know I like girls. So that's coming along nicely. I can't decide if I want more people to know, or no one to know.
That brings my total up to four. If ninth grade me could see me now...
But seriously. Last year, I attempted to form a friendship with one of the guys in my class. We had a casual acquaintanceship for a while, but never progressed past school friends, and I eventually just gave up.
So, I work at Kroger now. It's kind of boring, but I like it. I wear my rainbow bracelet to work every day (I wear it everywhere every day), and the other day, the girl that works customer service said she liked it. She then gestured at it and asked if I was....
Those were her exact words. "Are you....?"
I was supposed to have a party with two of my friends tonight. One of them got in a fight with her mom and can't come, so we're going to try and move the party to tomorrow night.... so now I have nothing to do. Bleh.
Also, my friend with the boyfriend that I hate is hanging out with the boyfriend that I hate. So can't do anything with her either. Looks like I'll be doing everything with my parents all night. And by everything, I mean sitting around quietly occupying ourselves without interacting with one another. Wheeeee.
A few days ago I was at the supermarket with one of my guy friends. We were headed toward the checkout lanes with our armload of donuts, when one of the employees began to speak to me.
"Was it a dare?"
(Was what a dare? What is she talking about?) "Huh?"
"Was it a dare? The makeup?"
(What's wrong with my makeup? It's only eyeliner and mascara.... it's not outrageous or anything... is it smeared down my face? Is it-- wait. She couldn't possibly think...) "Um... I'm a girl."
"No, REALLY?" (Her face contorts into an expression of awe)
Every time I come on here with the intention of actually writing a post, I get overwhelmed and distracted when I realize how long it's been since I logged on and how much I have to talk about. But I'm trying my hardest to actually write a post this time.
My family and I were at an amusement park (Holiday World to be exact) for the past day and a half. While waiting in an hour-long line for a one-minute ride, I saw something terrifying. The man in front of me had a tattoo that read: TO TOUGH TO TAME
The grammar snob in me was appalled. Then I wondered if anyone had ever told him that his tattoo had a grammatical mistake. Then I got excited because I thought I'd only ever see misspelled tattoos on the internet.
I need someone I can talk to. Someone who can keep my secrets, and stop talking about themselves for one minute to actually HEAR what I have to say.
Until then, I'll stay here, where I can rant, and talk and be myself while hidden behind the anonymity of a username.
So, hi. :)