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Stream of consciousness (long journal time)

This is just a compilation of the more significant thoughts I've had throughout the (very long) day. Some of it has been in my mind a while, and I'll use that to begin a stream of consciousness that will likely go all over the place and become an unorganized mess.

And this sort of is mostly written for myself, but I do want other people to read it and just give me some spiritual inspiration, or insight, or whatever you think of. Treat this page as much of a stream of consciousness for you as for myself.

I guess this first section will become a continuation of the haircut one.

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Pensive anticipation

I'm looking forward to when I get to go out and do stuff alone. Then I can actually go and look for a boyfriend, because that's when I will actually have the means to keep a relationship.
Until then, I'll just lay around, listening to some political and spiritual commentary from the Amazing Atheist while pondering both his arguments and other subjects that come to my mind.

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I found him.

The final boss of the Internet:

Thank you, /b/.

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Just got a haircut.

I approve of it. I usually think my haircuts look pretty bad at first, and then they seem better, but this time I think it looks good immediately.

I'm starting to care more about my appearance. I don't even care what other people think of me (unless they're potential boyfriends), so I don't know why. Maybe I'm just becoming gayer.

Things to do

Listen to some good music. Like maybe a work in progress, a remake of one of my older songs:

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Second journal today shall remain untitled.

Sometimes I do sort of still want a boyfriend. A small percentage of the time, when I have nothing else to occupy my mind, but still. But there are no openly gay people my age in the area. The closest to my age I know of is some disgustingly feminine guy who, according to what my sister's told me of him (even though she was his friend), he sounds extremely ignorant and annoying.

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Mitt the twit's lead shall soon be over.

Hopefully, at least. The town hall election is coming tonight, and I know he'll be bad at that. he can't answer questions he isn't prepared for, because he doesn't believe anything he says. It's just all rehearsed. When he hears a question he can't answer, he likes to just ignore it, so Obama has this one. Then again, Obama has proven to disappoint a lot, because he's a pussy.

We need another Bill Clinton. I'm going back and looking at his town hall debate in 1992. Damn, he was a good debater. He answered immediately with no hesitation, and still made good arguments. Bravo, Bill.

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My great new friends

Everybody I talked to in class last year is gone now, in different classes, so I have new "friends". They're completely unaware that I'm gay because I never new them until now, yet one of them keeps saying things like "you're gay" and shit. They're usually pretty cool, though. One of the people at my lunch this year is someone I've sat at the same table with, and he's ultra-conservative (though not homophobic; he just seems obsessed with economic conservatism). But he seems okay. Still, this isn't nearly as awesome as last year. All my friends now are nerds.

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Something on-topic for the web site

Well, this was supposed to be an on-topic journal. It kind of turned out differently. Fuck you, read it anyway.

I'm growing increasingly misanthropic (thanks to the Amazing Atheist). Right now I'm sort of at 50% of people other than me should die, the other 50% is okay. Or maybe more like: 10% of the time everybody else should horribly die before me while I watch the world burn, the other 90% of the time I'm calm and I don't give a fuck.

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Productivity

I started a new game on VVVVVV yesterday. A few hours later I had completed the game and collected all shiny trinkets. This is what I'm doing with my life.

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Poetry is gay.

You're gay.

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Useless waste of human flesh, fucking everything you see

I just started getting back into metal. I stopped listening to it because metalheads are fucking ignorant almost to the point that I ironically want to kill all of them. (Hyperbolic, but still ironic.)
But Chelsea Grin is too fucking awesome to ignore.

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I think elph would be interested in this.

A song from the upcoming deadmau5 album:

I knew he was good at intros, but this is just ridiculous.

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I am fucking tired as fuck.

Please don't read this unless you're genuinely interested in my life.

School started and that's fuck.

I also found out about speedcore, and that is just fucking awesome. It's like hardcore EDM, but at around 1,000 BPM:

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This is living.

I've just been doing pretty much nothing. I finished VVVVVV and Portal 2 a while ago, and now I'm obsessed with LSD: Dream Emulator. That game keeps getting weirder and weirder. It's getting weird to the point where it's almost terrifying. It's so awesome.

Besides LSD, I've been listening to dubstep and going on occasional trips with my family. That is all. Oh, and I'm reading To Kill a Mockingbird for school, but that book is disgustingly southern.

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HAPPY CAPS LOCK DAY!

IT PROBABLY ISN'T REAL, BUT I'M CELEBRATING IT ANYWAY.

NOT MUCH HAS BEEN GOING ON. A BIT OF DUBSTEP PRODUCTION, BUT I HAVEN'T FINISHED ANYTHING YET. I STARTED PLAYING LSD, AND THAT IS A PRETTY TRIPPY VIDEO GAME. Y'ALL SHOULD PLAY IT. MORE TOMORROW. MY MOTHER IS TELLING ME TO GO TO BED, SO YEAH, I DON'T HAVE ENOUGH TIME TO WRITE MORE.

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