It has been forever since I wrote! There's never time in between starting school, friends, family etc. Well lets start withe the good news: about a month ago I came out to Ari. She was totally fine with it. A little confused but the only question she asked was "Are you sure?" More good news my new school is AMAZING. I made more new friends in a week then I could have in the previous school. They all are fleeing from what sounds like terrible school experiences, like me. They have problems like autism but they could be the nicest people I have ever met.
I was just at province town for four days. The day before that I was talking to my mom about the four of us going (mom, dad, sister, me) and she told me she she had bad news, that my sister couldn't come. She's been depressed for two years so she's really behind in school so (as a punishment?) she had to stay home and do school work. Me; I want to be in school it distracts me from being depressed. But there was good news, my best friend (i'll just say Ari for privacy) was coming. The one who i can't figure out if I should tell her I'm lesbian or not.
My best friend is coming over for a sleep over, I know it sounds totally girly but it's still fun. None of that make over, chic flick, or gossip business. We may paint our nails or do a few prank calls, get a youtube account I don't know. I am really excited.
Best friend doesn't know I'm lesbian
I don't have a crush on her
I HAD a crush on her other friend
She might hate me cause she's catholic or a scared misinformed tween
Or she might not
I cant even begin to describe it, every day I just want to crawl into a cave and stay there. My parents might be fighting, they won't tell me or my sister what about but I know they are keeping a secret from us. My sister is sixteen and she has a boyfriend and he is always at the house. So its either moody sixteen year old or goofy-dating-teenager. Me, I'm stuck here thinking "the person I have a crush on probably isn't lesbian.
I cant remember how I figured out I was lesbian, I do all my major thinking at night so I think I was half asleep at the time. Both my parents are either psychologists or social workers so they're super cool about it and my only other sibling took it really well, and I don't really have a religion. But my family are the only people that know. Right now, its hard to be lesbian. I'm twelve, you may think that is way to young to know if I'm lesbian but I just know, you know? I've always been mentally more mature than most people in my grade.