I want to make a record of my time in Montreal this summer. This is it.
The Montreal Summer Organ Academy:
This is my last night here in Montreal. I'm not sad at all, because I'm sure I'll be back to this city in the future.
Montreal, city of organs and people and lots of alcohol.
It's been a strange summer. I've met lots of gay people from oberlin, where I will be going to school next year. I've even met straight people from Oberlin.
I'm back from Spain. I haven't written anything for several weeks.
I really don't have much to say. Although Spain was amazing, I still can't express it's amazingness succinctly.
Coming out is like taking a journey across the desert. I didn't come up with that, but it's the best image of coming out that I've ever encountered.
That's why Oasis is such a great name for this site. That's also why my name is Desert13. Well, well, well...
I used to go to sleep hoping for lucid dreams - I wanted to be able to act out what it would be like to come out, especially to Mom and Dad. Well, I never had that dream, but when I did come out to them the day after Christmas it was like a dream. The room was spinning.
In a valiant effort to avoid narcissism and talk about someone other than myself, I'm going to describe the life of Andrew, a crush of mine.
I suck. I'm 18 years of age and I don't have a boyfriend. There's no one in sight. Not only that, but I live way out on the outskirts of my city. (not suburbs, just outskirts). Yeah, that means I'm a 30 minute drive from the closest gay hangout. My school is out here, too, but it's to small and too damn closed-minded - I'm not going to find anyone here. (There are 43 seniors in my class).
I love it when random people IM me. I just got IMed by someone whose screen name looks like a reference to Joseph Stalin.
I talked a little with this (guy/girl). He (she) wouldn't tell me where they got my AIM name. It always freaks me out when this happens. I was scared that Joe might be a wicked insane stalker, but at the same time, I was kind of excited. OOoohh, talking to somebody new! The anonymity of the internet is so great.
I was angry and sad earlier and I just felt like writing poetry. Now I'm tired, but feeling much better. Ok, so it's alliterative and it sounds old-fashioned. It made me feel better.
Sonnet for Valentine's Day
When buds unfurl and creeping vines are new,
The rumbling wind and sky and pounding rain
Shall sweep away the snow that does remain.
Then birds shall sing and cows, their anthem, too.
I'm on Oasis! I'm so excited. It finally worked.
So I guess this is where I just start to spill everything - who I am, what I'm all about, where I'm from...
Well, Sat. night I found out that I suck at flirting. I went to this big pompous formal event with tuxedos and evening gowns and everything. I was at a table with this guy I hadn't seen in months. (Let's just call him Andrew). I knew he was gay when I saw him last September, at a friend's party, playing truth or dare in the hottub. Wow.