All I want for Christmas...
-End of all violence. End to war. End of violence towards women and girls. End of hate crimes. End of all violent acts.
-End of discrimination. Especially discrimination towards gay and lesbian people. I want everyone to be accepted for loving another person.
-End of confusion inside my head. I want to feel good again.
-I want to accept myself, and the way i look. I want to think everyday that i am beautiful.
Today was yet another day of finals-blah. She looked great again. We all get to wear free dress on finals days, and she was wearing the cutest outfit, and she flipped her hair again. She looks so beautiful with flipped hair, but she looks beautiful no matter what she does with her hair...heaven help me...
We all had to watch the school dance team today in the gym. A lot of people think it is really cheesy, but i watch it and secretly want to be one of those girls up there dancing. Their outfits are hot-form fitting dresses that go down to their knees and follow their body with the dance moves. But to be that good of a dancer, you have to be super flexible (not me) and well, i hate to say it, but you kind of do have to be thin. You don't have to be super skinny, but in order to look as good as they do in those outfits, you do have to be thin (which i am certainly not that thin). Oh well. I wonder what she would have thought of me if i did look that good and was on the dance team...
So recently i attended my friend's Christmas party. I'm usually not the party type,and this was the first party i had been to in, oh, let's say...a couple of years-but i was actually looking forward to it. I knew taht i would have a great time with my friend, but she invited all of these other girls that i don't really know that well, so it was a little awkward for me (being the shy person that i am). Anyways, it turned out to be okay. Just okay...not great, but okay. A really toned down okay in fact. We played some games, watched some movies, and talked about stuff in general. One of the movies that we watched was "Mean girls". I'm sorry to say, to anyone who thought this movie was the greatest thing ever, that i didn't see where there was any greatness to it. The script was great, and the idea was pretty creative, but the meaness of the girls was just too real for me to enjoy anything. So there i was sitting on the couch next to these girls who were laughing at/with the "Plastics" whenever they made fun of some poor unsuspecting girl. I for one can not find humor in that.
This is my first entry on this site. I joined because i thought that maybe,if i could just get in some kind of contact with other people my own age, who
may or may not be going through something i am, i could feel better with who i am-or who i am becoming. Not that i really expect anyone to read this,
but maybe it will just help sending my thoughts out into the void.
I am attracted to a girl. Before i met her, i was attracted to the idea