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A serious moral issue... Love triangle... HELP ME!!!!!

Ok, so ultamately I'll have to make my own decision on this... But it helps to write this out, and I cant write it on any of my other blogs because they will know who this guy is... Anywhay, I have these two friend... lets call them Lilly, and Jeff. Ok, so I've known Lilly for awhile, her and I used to be good friends, but in Junior year we started arguing a lot and she changed so much.

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Ok so We CAN talk about this... please help me figure out who I am!

I'm hopeing that you guys can help me figure this out :)

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I'm an ASS! my story of saving a friend...

Ok, so last night at 2 a.m. one of my friends called. They had went out clubbing and locked their keys in the car. They were deep in a bad part of the city and I am HORRABLE with directions. I flipped out. I was on the phone with them and I was talking about getting my glasses and a coat on and they flipped out and just started screaming "who cares about that just get into the car and come and get me!" SO I went. Couldnt see a damn thing. They were giving me directions as I went. Anywhay, when I didnt see the chinese place on the corner they flipped out. They started yelling at me for being such a bad driver, and because I was already in a panic, that sent me into a panic attack. Its like my third full fledged panic attack ever. Scary. I ended up going the wrong way down a three lane one way road. Car came at me and swerved to miss me. I bawled. I was lost and fricking scared. And I failed to save my friend. I couldnt figure out how to get back up the ramp... if it was one way then how did I get up it in the first place... Ended up that this "club" of theres was some run down joint in the middle of nowhere... They had to walk to the Mc. Donalds to meet me there...

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Just to update you all

You can read my old Journal entry for updates... The cops came... Now I will never trust the cops again. They said that anything he did to me bofore doesnt matter because I never called in on it. I tried to show them the bruises but once again they said that it didnt matter. They made me believe that it was my fault too. They said that the minute I knocked on the door that in Michigan thats concidered trespassing even if it is in my own appartment because it is his too.

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He touched me with it.... Was I just "molested"

He ran out of his room screaming, he was naked. He screamed at me and yelled at me and pinned me to the wall... He told me to look at his dick. He touched me with it while he was pushing me. I was screaming in the corner for minutes... He was my friend... He was suppost to be my friend... I never wanted to see him this way... He said that it was what I wanted. Why did he do this to me? WHY THE FUCK WOULD HE DO THAT TO ME! I cant continue like this...

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Uh oh!

So, I dont know whats going on but right now it feels like there are knives hacking their way through my stomach. Oww. It started during work today and it wont go away! (hey I made a rhyme) I'm trying to look up what it could be but no luck... I was going to update you on my life... (got asked out today!) but once again I made an excuse... Why do I do this to myself? I actually liked this guy! Whats wrong with me? Anywhay, if I make it through the night, stomach intact, I'll hopefully try and pass all my exams tomarrow!

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The dream that I had last night... it was a horrable dream but I was happy during it... wierdness!

I had this dream last night… I feel like it was a wrong dream to have… Yet through it all, I was kind of happy… I recently watched Q.A.F. where there is a pregnancy. It was wierd because I NEVER want to get pregnant, and I NEVER want to get married to my best friend. hmmm... tholughts anybody? Here is the dream...

"J" and I were in our apartment like usual. We decided to have a few drinks and we both got drunk. Our living room was almost the same as it is now, but the couch was moved towards the television more in the middle of the room. Well, I kind of blacked out from being drunk. I wasn’t passed out but when I woke up later I knew that we had had sex. I was nervous about it.

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*I need a hug, but nobody is here* You don't need to read this... Its just basically for me... I needed to get all this out...

Things are so hard right now. I'm scared to sleep because I had this dream that my parents got a devorce and I yelled and cried through the whole thing... I woke up with a headache and a runny nose (all signs of crying for hours on end) My parents are the perfect couple... It couldnt happen... There is no way but still I was pissed at my mom throughout the entire thing and I swore at her and told her that I never wanted to see her again... In the dream that is... not in real life...

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Confused. Maybe you can help before I go to a therapist (which I'm about ready to talk to one)

Ok, most of you on here know that I'm straight bla bla bla I dont need to tell the story again do I? :) Anywhay, I used to think about guy snon stop. I would always have crushes expecially on funny guys. Well, if you dont know me and my best friend (who is a gay guy) used to fight a lot. I don't know if this has anything to do with this but I'm just letting you know. Sometimes he would hurt me.

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Uh oh... I'm in "THAT" mood...

you know the mood. The mood when you call your ex's and tell them that you love them. The mood of cuddling. The mood when you make an ass out of yourself in your blog, or in public. I need lovins. I need to tell somebody that they are beautiful. I need to get a hug. I need all of these things. I havent had a boyfriend in forever and a day. I dont count any guys as a boyfriend. My best friend is amazing.

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I'm running out of money, my mom is offering to give me money but I dont want to take money from her, I feel so bad about it because my parents dont have money to give me... I have applied for countless jobs and I feel as if I screwed up this interview. If I dont get this job. I've waited so long. I cant STAND this. EVERY TIME they make it sound like you already have the job then "oh we hired another canadate (sp?) I am going to cry.

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Yea so my friend is pissing me off right now. He lies about everything... I am just mostly pissed because I cant have any gay friends without him either having sex with them or showing them his naked body... IM FUCKING SICK OF THIS SHIT! Why do fucking gay guys (or is it just him) have some desire to show everybody their frigging dick... It pissed me off because I have one guy friend who my best friend is torturing...

What type of school are you going to this year?

Just starting college as a freshman!
13% (14 votes)
In college but It's not my first year.
11% (12 votes)
Just starting high school as a freshman.
12% (13 votes)
In high school but its not my first year.
50% (56 votes)
Just starting middle school as a freshman.
0% (0 votes)
In middle school but it's not my first year.
8% (9 votes)
Not attending school.
6% (7 votes)
Total votes: 111
help_me_god's picture

WHY AM I ANNOYED? I'll tell ya! and then you can rant with me!

How can people be so friggin obsessed with people! I mean, one of my friends met up with this kid and had sex with them, they only seen them in person for four days. All they talk about is how "I need a boyfriend again!" I try to help them find a person. But they never like who I find because "they arent him!" Well, they keep on asking me what I think, and today I just couldnt hold it in. I said "either stop saying that you need another boyfriend, or let go of this person that you dont even really talk to anymore! They dont care if you move on, in fact they TOLD you to! So MOVE ON ALREADY!" Grrr... I dont get this. They keep on trying to meet guys online but it aint working because "nobody is like him. I never liked anybody but him!" And now he is really pissed. I tried to say I'm sorry but they yelled and told me "its none of my business so but out!" excuse me? EXCUSE ME!?!? Stop fucking complaining to me then! Dont fucking bring up your dumb ass relationsip problems... ask me about what i think about it... then yell at me when I give my opinion!

If your friend or loved one died in a bad position (Pants pulled down on the floor) what would you do?

Pull pants back up, make them look better so they arent remembered that way.
85% (22 votes)
Leave them how they are, who cares they are dead.
15% (4 votes)
Total votes: 26
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