I saw my grades today, and they were awful. I can’t complain because I was responsible for everything. I started with a 4.0 GPA, but now it went down drastically. I wish I could just turn back the hands of time. I enjoyed spending time with my friends, that most of the time I delayed my schoolwork. I tried so hard to study in the finals, but things were different now. We moved to a new place, and I was still adjusting.
This pain inside would not go away, I have cried an ocean of tears in silence. My mind grew tired and weak from thinking of an explanation to this insanity. My feet were tired from walking. The darkness was engulfing the sky rapidly. I could feel the wind raging against my frail body. I started to pick up my pace searching for answers. I wish I could forge my emotions. I was trapped in a whirlpool for a long time, that I could not move forward. I was confined in the events of the past, that I kept on obsessing about it. I felt depressed, lost, and empty deep within. I was imprisoned by the boundaries of my imagination and illusion. Confusion and chaos enveloped me. Nothing seemed to be going right. I failed and I could not pull myself up. These broken dreams destroyed me, my expectations came crushing down, and I lost myself. My heart was lost in a maze entangled with vines; it was bruised and hard to find. I have lost track of time, as I gathered the shattered pieces of myself and tried to put them all back. Conflicting emotions started to rise as I saw the bits and pieces of me. Although my wound was healed, the experience did not die.
Fear never escaped my mind. Although my bruise was gone, the experience did not die. It was playing in my head continuously. I could never sleep in the dark; it was too frightening for me. I could not stand being alone; the thought was haunting me. The world was not safe anymore. I hid myself in my own shell for a long time; I could not stand it any longer. It was up to me if I would sink or swim.