I only have one life to live - one chance to get it right. I don't have TIME to be pleasing other people. I have only this one opportunity to be worthy of your love.
Tonight I was talking to someone who shall remain nameless -selekta- and she said that we all have a pleasure threshold - ie there is a limit to how much pleasure we can tolerate. I'm obsessed with a concept that I thought up in a former life when I was Kahlil Gibran: "the pain of too much tenderness".
Doesn't it freak any of the users out that there are always hundreds of guests and only a few users on this site at any one time?
I mean right now there are 402 guests on this site, and only 6 users!!!!
What the fuck are all those people reading?!!!! Why are they just watching?
I think I'm paranoid, but really those people can read anything you write and my question is, besides the harmless bored/curious lot and those who are too scared to register, what are the rest of them DOING?!
"Girl im in love with you
This ain't the honeymoon
Past the infatuation phase
Right in the thick of love
At times we get sick of love
It seems like we argue everyday "
"And though love sometimes hurts
I still put you first "
"Sometimes it's heaven sent
We head back to hell again
We kiss and we make up on the way "
"But as our love advances
We take second chances" (or fifteenth)
"She loves to get her pussy licked... But bow down bitch, coz I ain't drunk enough to do that" (Probably got the lyrics wrong) Whaaaat? What the hell is going on in these lyrics? Disgusting man. Why do men freak when they have to give their girlfriends head, yet she's supposed to want to suck him off whenever he wants? Ah........see why I'm a lesbian?
This site is addictive! I log on every morning before school and as soon as I get back. I can't seem to stop posting things (and annoying people). 5 hours ago I swore I would never log on again because people were being mean to me.... Yeah well...shit happens.
Again, especially to Selekta who might be bisexual - I apologise for the statements I made. I am sorry babe.
Selekta bet Z$500 000 on the FA Cup Final between Arsenal and Manchester United. Hope she wins. Go Man U!
Have you ever been with someone and it was like Heaven? Like you felt so comfortable and your body was literally humming from that good feeling for hours afterwards?
I'm so on cloud Ninety Nine!
Selekta came to my house today and we made out for a while, and she started giving me head until we heard my mum, I think it was, on the phone outside my door. Damn! I've never seen Selekta leap up and change so fast. So we went out... Had this yummy yummy meal and it just tasted so good cause she was with me and we were laughing at everything! (The mother of the toddler I laughed at uproariously for falling down some steps, wasn't too happy though). Ah fuck it! I was sooooo content just "chillin with my baby". Then we strolled around the flea market laughing at things, so in love, laughing at the world. Pitying the world because they don't have what I have. Selekta doesn't seem to have a problem being affectionate in public even though it's against the law. That's gonna be a problem now that we're going out more.
Everyone's a god damn poet!
in these days...
(This poem is about my...
my emotional turmoil and complete disillusion ...
blah blah blah. Ha ha
It's such a pity that when it became
widely accepted not to use rhyme
or ordered stanzas, it also became
acceptable to write nonsense too
- hey, it just seemed an appropriate thing to say - hint hint selekta and your last poetic entry) :)
I figured out what I want today, and wouldn't you know it, it wasn't complicated at all, just really simple actually. I was flipping through a friend's diary at school (she's a really happy person so she draws colourful butterflies, smiley faces etc and writes jokes throughout)and she's really in love (sickeningly so just like me), so her boyfriend's name was inscribed lovingly everywhere right alongside the butterflies and hearts...
I just realised how alone i is... It's a one letter utterance.
standing naked in a sentence of full fat colonies of lettered groups.
i is not like a.
a is fat and round, well-nourished and jovial.
i is a skinny isolated bitch.
i is not in us.
i is not a couple walking down "une belle rue en soleil."
i is me, by myself.
A woman can be silent and the whole world will sit up and listen. Everything about a woman whispers mystery, power and beauty.... Everything she touches is blessed with worth. She commands respect with a voice that is not loud but reverberates with a violence... She is a mountain you want to climb and a hole that you wish would just swallow you deeply - completely. She sweeps eveyone in her path off their feet.
her eyes don't even wonder anymore...
I'm so fucking mad! KC???????????? Craig??????????? Rumbi??????????? Jesus you really know how to be faithful! You can't even just like one god damn person.
I must be from the middle ages in this belief- not even, they were infidels- but I believe when you love you can only love one.
How would you like it if I went back to him?
I don't know why I'm so pissed, but you're breaking my heart.
And isn't it crazy?
Ever so crazy?
She doesn't even know how much it hurts to look at her
She doesn't even realise I see her every time I blink
And here it is... what I always hoped I'd find
Wrapped in the wrong wrapping- a girl.
Isn't it scary? Two years together, still as fresh as ever.
Isn't it scary?
Who is this woman she's made me into? A woman who now must question whether she likes girls...