Just had our first university debate.
We lost. We were affirming.
It was impromptu twenty minutes preparation, which was awesome. Eight minute speeches each. Except we had this new guy who thought he knew everything - simply because he's a fourth year law student - but all he did was ramble and didn't structure his argument at all. He screwed us over pretty much. We won the principle side of the debate, but not the practical side because he couldn't even outline a model.
So much reading.
Lol I love debating. I totally ripped this guy in my philosophy class to pieces (metaphorically...). He was an acquaintance though (now friend-on-facebook), but I just found his views very 'flawed' (we were having a discussion about our ethics assignment - so no I wasn't ripping into him for no reason) . He's writing his assignment supporting Bentham's Utlitarianism - and he's willing to sacrifice an individual for the 'greater' good of the majority. Of course we can already think of problems with that. I basically obliterated his argument... now he doesn't know what to write lol.
So I came second in the running for first year rep for the debating society at the top university in New Zealand. It does suck, but I'm going to have to accept it. I don't like it when people come up to me and say "nah I heard they had *insert winning's girls name* in a bag - you should've won" - because frankly I don't know if a) that is true and b) I didn't win so it just annoys me more. I do know most of the executives though and most came up and congratulated me anyway. Some voted for me, and another exec said I was "very close".
It's different because it was my last year.
I'm still annoyed I didn't volunteer for student rep for my philosophy lecture. One of the girls totally sucks at pubicly speaking and doesn't deserve it. It ruins a lot of my chances of meeting new people. But I mean, student rep isn't that important anyway. It just looks good on a CV, I'm going to keep telling me that. I"m still very annoyed.
Talking to BW, the boy who 'reminded me of myself' a while back. He's a year younger than me and still at the high school I graduated from.
He tells me how he was thinking about me the other day and how he's taken my spot as the 'gay year 13 who drinks a lot' lol. But of course he admitted he couldn't really live up to me. Probably in the drinking respect.
Reading textbooks is like taking a knife to your imagination.
The words crawl on the page like insects, until they chew your brain out. Reading about the history of New Zealand isn't boring, but it also isn't very engaging. I feel more knowledgeable, but I do not feel better empowered to synthesise with my mind. Utilitarianism in philosophy class is interesting, it's applicable, but they are still bound by rules, they are normative theories to be applied - in a almost fixed and logical way.
So, Saturday night, and I'm doing nothing. Except listening to Leona Lewis and feeling annoyed.
I'm supposed to be at this party tonight. But because I was out having dinner so my friend couldn't pick me up. The dinner tasted like shit. But only because my mind was somewhere else. It was too spicy anyway. It was a fucking buffet. It costed bloody twenty dollars. A stupid moth flew into the soup too. Fucking dinner.
And fucking J. He can never answer a question properly. I hate his passive aggression. It was the reason tonight was all messed up.
So, after the first official day at university I've come to the conclusion university guys are not very good looking. There are some really gorgeous ones, but a lot don't even seem to take pride in their appearance. I guess I'm being too harsh... I am a guy at the university too. It just disappointed me a little. I didn't sign up for the gay club today because the guy sitting there was... urgh.
So tomorrow is when university officially begins. I'm going to Auckland Univeristy. I didn't end up applying for American universities, my parents just doesn't have that kind of money and there was no guarantee I'd get in anyway. I still think about it a little bit though.
I'm doing a conjoint degree. My first degree is a law degree, and my second one is an arts degree. I'm majoring in politcs and ethics for my arts degree, but that might change. My first lecture tomorow is law and society, then I have introduction to ethics. All these courses make me sound too old before I am wise.
Degree: Law and arts.
Bye-bye maths and science.
I feel very sad right now. It's like saying goodbye to a big part of me. I hope this is the right choice. I don't think anyone understands though.
Again I'm on my itouch again... I find this is probably a good way for me to keep my journal entries short. Orientation was good. I loved seeing everyone again it was awesome it felt like all the high schools combined into a mega high school. I went to the orientation for law students... And there were already two people I knew in my eight person group... It was pretty cool. I'm not too sure who I'd be the closest to in university though. Right now I'm just enjoying the new change. The law people seem a little arrogant though.
So I'm typing this entry with my itouch right now it's a little slow but I'm just lying in bed haven't been able to sleep for the past few hours... And it's really annoying.
Having a few issues and just can't get them out of my head. So frustrated... And this keyboard's so small...
I really need to sleep. I've seriously been neglecting my health lately. I need to stop drinking... And orientation for university is tomorrow morning, and I'm stil up feeling all weird. I'm a bit of a mess
I'm in love. I'm not.
On Wednesday, the day I arrived back in New Zealand, I went out like I said I would. I was tired. I hadn't slept on the plane. But I didn't want to stay in my room, I wanted to be free, to be with my friends and forgetting things.
There was this new guy in our group. Let's call him M. My mates met him during the holiday. It was his party that Wednesday. When I met him, he said J told him a lot about me, nice things. I said same here. He reminds me of B, someone I had a crush on - but so much more chilled.