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HE SO FINE

For all of you oblivious people, guess what - it's Queen's Birthday weekend in New Zealand. That means I get tomorrow (Friday) and the weekend and Monday off. SO EPIC. YEAH.

That's why there's a party on tonight. Just got home... It was in town, my mate she rented a whole club and it was pretty crazy! Danced till I dropped... gawd I'm so tired right now. Had so much fun! Raving, talking, screaming, ranting and talking about nothing and everything...

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BOYS

Although it might sound like an ego boost more than anything, which is definitely not my intention, I'm sick of chicks falling for me instead of guys.

On the weekend when I go to parties, I get to meet all these people. And half of them tends to be whipped bitches, some drunk, some easy, some sleezy, and given those preconditions it's not hard for them to fall for me. Point is, while it's flattering knowing someone likes me, it is also disheartening every single time to know it's a girl and not a guy.

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Things and Thoughts

Sup guys.

It's the weekend... let's all agree that weekends are awesome. Hope everyone's having a great time... doing whatever they like or don't like, partying or sleeping or eating or finally feeding their dog.

I have to get a haircut tomorrow, got told off at school. I hope it looks nice. I really want to keep my fringe. I want to keep it for the ball.

Got my suit sorted for the ball. That took the whole afternoon. It's a white suit - I got a waistcoat too. It looks pretty good. Hung out with my date's nana, by golly she's funny.

More updates on the ball closer to it.

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Breakdown at School

Just a cry for help. A soliloquy for everybody and nobody.

School and work has just been a bit hectic lately.

Grades have not been the best (and I mean the best, which is what I want and have been capable of).

And all my friends seem all so stressed, no one to turn to. Yet, some people stress for the tiniest of reasons.

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Singing, sleeping, mooting, eating, filming, breathing, studying

Sang for four hours each day in the weekend for choir.

Two big tests tomorrow.

Then after school a four hour drive and back to attend a mooting competition in Hamilton.

AND still preparing for this mooting competition tonight.

AND still studying for the tests tomorrow.

Have to be up early before seven for mooting practice.

Then on Tuesday, have to be up early to act in friend's media film.

And do an impromptu debate that night.

Then on Wednesday, have to lead the bloody House Choir, and rehearse with the House Band.

Had lots of KFC today.

That was good.

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Soliloquy for a Saturday Night

Soliloquy.

Don't you dare.

Don't you dare take this at face value.

Don't you ever ever put me in a box.

Lonely but not lonely.

Wanting more and more.

Simply just want everything.

Don't take something for granted.

Don't want to be in denial.

Oh, don't tell me any of those inferred, judgemental or pitying thoughts.

Want someone but don't.

Everything is full of contradictions.

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WTF

*Omitted*

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Well...

Won't say much.

Just had a really shit day. Definitely not a feel-good day, not at all. The direct complete opposite.

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Short update before bed

HUGE crush at school.

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Today

Wrote a three and half hour exam today.

Had mc donalds afterwards...

Talking about mc donalds... that reminds me of the weekend. It was a pretty epic weekend, but no time to recount it right now. It was so nice to get out there and relax though...

A good friend bursted into tears at school today. He's too much of a perfectionist... I hope he's better.

No real updates on the boy. We're texting though.

More tests coming up this week...
More crap to do...

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Words

Flying falling
Not thinking about cakes or heartaches
Dancing drooping
Emptiness jumping at the vibrancy

Drowning frowning
In slimy sweat seeping
Singing sulking
Of the beautiful caged birds

Blazing haze
Smoke smothering the lights
Bright lights
Blind me from my unnerving hindsight

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Yes, no, he likes me, he likes me not

BUT DO I LIKE HIM?

I'm such an asshole.

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And Jason Said

Jason saw Jesse at the first day of school
Jesse was cool and Jason a fool
I don't care how, I want to be with you now
Jason thought

Jason can't drive and alone he bused
Speeding alongside Jesse's car passed
I don't care how, I want to be with you now
Jason thought

Jason likes music and drama
Jesse played rugby from afar
I don't care how, I want to be with you now
Jason thought

Many times Jason said hi
Jesse rushed by with no reply
I don't care how, I want to be with you now
Jason thought

For an hour Jason did his hair
Jesse simply didn't care

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Gift of Words

We are gifted with the power of words.

The power of clarity of expression, to be able to communicate intangible ideas into defined, boxed, concrete meanings that are - words.

Let us not abuse that power, and in effect, rob ourselves and everyone of that privilege.

I think precision in the manipulating of language is vital in understanding ourselves, our thoughts, and new concepts. Because what are words but to symbolise ideas? Thoughts and behavioural patterns are subjected to the frameworks put in place by our knowledge of words.

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Movie and Updates

Short update before I head off to bed.

Update about the "petition" against anti-gay policies for the school ball:
We presented the plan and had a discussion about the issue to the scholars group today. We had a secret ballot and everyone unanimously agreed to the cause. We're going to convince the student council then student leaders next. Then afterwards, probably writing a formal complaint to the headmaster then delivering a presentation to the staff. Let's hope for the best. I'm glad everyone is really supportive of the cause.

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