9 slashs... on my arms...
Yet, I should not have let
your hands hold me close
or your words steal my heart
I feel really happy for the first time in awhile. Don't get me wrong, my life's far from perfect, but now it feels like everything will be okay, eventually. It's like something inside of me just clicked...My dilemma of the moment is what to do about my upcoming Dorm Dance.
Now that I have your attention...The other night I posted a 'thought' about Porn...Now I've come to another situation that allows for the same line of thinking to apply. No, this has nothing to do with Porn or rape, however it does have to do with distraction and blame...And yes, I'll mention the soccer team again...
This is the way my brain works...
Okay heres the thing, I have come to a grim conclusion of quiting this stupid college. I am not proud of it, but when one's becomes very fusterated, one's has no choice but to drop out. To fail the classes and get bad GPA on your record is not ideal. So I have two choices, to try and work very hard to get all A's to bring the grades up with missing class I have missed. Or quit to save yourself the burden.
Last nite at a friends place the discussion came up with the guys. How much money would it take for you to give another guy a blow job. I was the only gay one there, there was an interesting conversationa bout it. every guy said they would do it for a certain amount of money. except for one guy. he said he would probably need heavy counselling after it. my response? "You'd cretainly have the money to pay for it"
I feel so much commotion in my mind and body, it's driving me insane. My stomach is shooting with fire crackers and my mind is compressed with heavy rocks, my breath is suffocated in my own lungs. Am I being reasonable, blaming life for my own annoyances? Do I have a right to crib about something so insignificant as not having a girlfriend? An empty mind really is a devil's workshop, but an overwhelemed mind is a devil's worst enemy.
no this is not an e.e. cummings poem......;)
The scene: Paris, 1927. A time of the great writers Gertrude Stein and Ernest Hemingway.
Heingway, unbeknownced to Gertrude and Alice, has been bad mouthing the pair to anyway who will listen. (In legend, this is because Gertrude was seducing one of his wives with Alice's brownies. This is legend of course.)
Gertrude and Alice go to their barbar, but to their horror he has left town. Gertrude complains about this bad luck to her 'friend' Ernest who reccomends his personal barber who tends to his entire family. He is thanked and the couple goes on their way. Ernest calls ahead and askes for a bit of a practical joke...to shave their heads.
After a couple of intense impromptu debates, I went home to my boarding school, and my friends and I all sat down and talked for about an hour in the caf at dinner. Seated to my right was my debating partner, a particularly smart and interesting boy I shall call Nesterly. To my left was an incredibly hot bi chick with her chair slanted slightly towards me and her leg touching my ass. Across from me was Sidney, and beside her was No Ah.
Guys and porn. What else could a bi girl ask for? Well...maybe girls too.
What do flip flops, the DMV, and mullets have in common?
They're really just random occurences in my blog for now.