Living in a suburb, in a state that constantly rains, and in a chaotic family comes me. I'm your typical boy next door and like most people on here I'm gay, or am I? Only time will tell really. Being in the closet isn't much fun. I have to feel bad all the time, ask God why me, and thank God for repealing DADT, if I do come out by the time I start to serve. I took up this Journal as a new hobby for me and to give all of you the documentation of the life of a boring teenager who is yes, in the closet. Wow big surprise there, eh? Sure one person (my bestfriend) has suspicions about my sexuality, and sure when she or anyone else asks I deny that I am, and sure I also have only had girlfriends. I'm also a virgin and the closest I've been is a damn peck on the lips. I'm almost a legal adult! That's a bit effed up if you ask me.
Although it pains me greatly to post thrice in the span of four and twenty hours, this truly merits immediate note.
I just came out to my parents!
It was, I think, on Wednesday evening that I finally acted on the thought that had been nagging the back of my mind for a while, which thought being that I really needed to come out to my female friend, whom I shall codename Regi, now that I know for sure that I'm not straight.
I had always figured coming out to my parents would be an emotional and tear-filled time, that I would plan for it for days or weeks beforehand, that it wouldn't happen until I had a relatively solid label for my queeritude, or else that one of them would just ask bluntly and outright, giving me no time to prepare, and the emotional and tear-filled scene would follow. I had also figured that something would be fundamentally a little bit different afterward - maybe just a load off my chest, maybe some sort of change in the family atmosphere. But this... Not what I expected at all.
So, I guess I wanted to put my coming out story here, for some reason. The following paragraphs are an excerpt from a letter I wrote to one of my favorite authors, who so happens to be lesbian so when I wrote to tell her how much I loved her book I put my coming out story in there as well. Here goes.
Well i came out all but 4 years ago, but i just fund this site and think its amazing. So i feel an obligation to haveing my True E coming out story on here. (haha) Ive never actually written a blog so this is a bit new to me. Comments to let me know if their are any tips to makeing it better or more intresting would be amazing!!
I finally told my friends about myself, and it wasn't incredibly awkward because everybody was sharing their own stories, not neccessarily having to do with LGBTQ identities, though. At a sleepover my friends and I were all sharing secrets and when it was my turn to inform them of one of my secrets, I explained that I only had two big secrets that they didn't already know. Those two being, first, that I am transsexual, and second, that I like a girl from our school.
It started when I was young I alawys felt more attracted to girls but thought it was wrong for me. (I had nothing aginst gay people though) It could have been because I went to catholic school. (churchs conflicting views) I spent k-8th at that same small school in a big city. i spent most of my child hood preventing any thing that could make me seem gay or is "gay"(Some Psychologist interpet it as a sign of being gay). In high school I believe I came out to 2 male friends (that later came out to me).[I also had a boyfriend that randomly told me he knows I like girls.
My life is full of adventures, dilemmas and weird situations.
For now, I'll talk about how I come out to my friend.
so today wasn't too bad.
So today was totally one of those days, a day where the whole world decideds to drop on you at once, which isn't all bad cause it can be very "freeing" dealing with everything at once, you know? Anyways we're going to do a lot of back tracking in this journal, bare with me please because this is to help me through all of this and maybe even help someone else out some day.
So, my parents know about my sexuality; I told them about a year ago. The problem is they're Christian and completely reject that part of me. We haven't really talked about it since I came out to them, but it's still hanging around the air. There's always those quiet, awkward moments after someone says something when everyone knows everything's thinking about me being gay. It hurts me to know that my family doesn't accept me, and they don't even try to learn what it's all about. All they know is the bible says it's wrong, end of story.
SO yeah. My mom had kind of asked me a few weeks ago, and my really brave answer was "That's a personal question," and apparently she and my little sister drew from that I was thinking I might be bisexual, so, unbeknownst to me, she told my dad and older sister (but not my bro). But while we were walking the family dog on Friday, she said "Have you thought any more about whether or not you're bisexual?," and then I was like, "No, I think I'm a lesbian," and that there was a really high probability, and we had this really nice talk.
I'm sure there are other posts like this, but whatever. So... The question is, do your parents know? If so, how did you bring it up? What were their reactions? If not, are you going to tell them? How? When? And which parent would be (or is) more accepting?
I am now technically out on Facebook......It was a vital step in a positive direction and now its done with( I've yet to experience any fallout but than again it hasnt even been a day)
It's over with. I won't be going to great lengths to hide my sexuality, yet I won't be volunteering this information to that many people either.
That would be dumb.
Interested In; Women, Men,
Looking for: Friendship, Dating, A Relationship, Networking.....
Why should i lose sleep over being shut out by people who are barely in my life to begin with?
I'm gay... i just realized this.
except i have a girlfriend. and i don't wanna tell her that the reason i wanna break up is because i'm gay.
even if i made up a reason, if she saw me or heard. about me going out with a guy, she'd like kill herself... because nowadays, at least at my school, it's social suicide to date a gay guy before he comes out. and to make matters worse, i've already met her parents and i have a crush on her gay best friend (he's literally the cutest boy i've ever seen, other than ones on TV).
what do i do?
Well, I'm going to tell like everyone I know. But do I just go to the front of the classroom and just say "I'm not straight. At all. Or even close."? Do I tell everyone one on one? That's boring! What should I do to spread this?
so I'm out to my dad...
dad: what? you have a boyfriend?
me: no....i'm gay
dad: what do you mean you're gay?
me: i'm gay, as in i like girls
dad: you don't like girls
me: what do you mean i dont like girls? dad, i'm serious. i'm gay
dad: why do you like girls?
me: why do you like girls?
dad: i'm a boy
dad: do you have a girlsfriend?
dad: then why do you like girls?
me: i dont need a girls friend to like girls
dad:so you're gay as in happy gay?
me: what? no, yes, i'm both terms
dad: ok (hugs)